All children are having different nature and behavior. Some children become stubborn and rebellious nature. First we need to understand what these are:
Stubborn meaning showing obstinate determination not to change one’s position or attitude on something, especially in spite of good reasons to do.
Rebellious meaning who is not easily controlled.
Stubborn kids shows this behavior any time like while taking bath, eating food, during study or doing their school home work (study) etc. It is not necessary that only toddlers have stubbornness but you can also notice it in the children of the age group of 3-9. It is due to parents unable to understand and handle their toddlers’ this behavior on time; later it may turn to the teenage rebellion/problems.
Dealing with stubborn and rebellious kids is really a tough task for parents. Parents should have special skills to handle such children. Some time there will be required special care to deal with the situation. It is a sensitive task so parents require lots of patience and tricks while dealing with it without making their kids feel hurt or disappointed.
Here are a few suggestions for the parents which can be followed to deal with the stubborn child:
Avoid argument with stubborn kid
Most of the parents do mistake they argue and force to their child to rectify. It is not correct way to handle your stubborn kid. By that way your children will be into the stress and undergo to the lots of tensions. Never do argument and must have to take the situation to such a stage where children feel that you are understanding them. When your children insist on doing or not doing something ask from them that what’s bothering them can do the trick.
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Offer options to your child
Most of the times when you offer something to your stubborn children then they deny to do it. For example; If you offer to drink milk shake :
Mom offer: “I am bringing milk shake for you to drink.”
Answer: No! I don’t want to drink.
They will directly deny it. to have it. Give two options according to the interest of your stubborn child’s behavior. Like:
Mom offer: “Do you want to drink banana shake or chocolate shake?”
Answer: “I would like to drink chocolate shake.”
This is also an example of closed communication. If you offer two things then child will think that you will bring which he/she will choose. Their opinion matters.
Communicate with your child
You should not be rude towards your child due to their stubbornness and Rebellious behavior. You should listen to your child. Understand what they are trying to convey you as it may resolve most of the problem. Parents should always do friendly behavior with their stubborn children, specially when they are tensed or angry otherwise they will feel like abandoned or unloved.
Praise your stubborn child
You should praise your child's work. When they will do any good work then don't forget to praise them by saying some magical words like "Nice!", "I proud on you!", "Keep it up!" etc. It will boost-up their moral and they will do extra efforts for doing their future tasks. In some days you will feel change in them. Praising will also develop a positive behavior in them. Parent child relationship also becomes stronger.
Create a friendly and positive environment
You should create a loving happy atmosphere at home. Do not keep office or business problems in front of children. You are role model of them. If you look scared and worried then how your children will be happy? They will learn the same thing and their attitude will be develop accordingly. Do not quarrel and debate with your spouse in front of your children. Children's have little wit, it can have adverse effects on their mind [Also read "Are you in happy married life"]. Always be happy in front of your kids so that they feel comfortable. If your stubborn kids feel friendly with you then slowly they will start sharing each and every thing with you.
Give diversion to stubborn mind
It is a very effective parenting technique to deal with your stubborn child. diversion is an activity that diverts the mind from tedious or serious concerns. You need to observe your stubborn kids' activities. Suppose he looks anything in the market and ask to purchase for him/her. But that is not good [health wise / cost wise], you need to use diversion technique. You can immediately say for diversion [directing to another thing/toy]:
“Hay! look at that toy. Seems to be very stylist. Unique color, different etc. What do you think?”
Please note that your voice must be very surprising, you have to use your presence of mind and then you have to ask a question]
Your kid’s mind will immediately look at that and will observe that toy/thing carefully to answer your question.
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Dealing stubborn child while study
You need to deal with your stubborn child because he/she is not willing to do study or finishing his/her home work. You can pick anyone or more options as per your situation (Read article for more details: Do you Know How Your Child be a Good Learner?):
- Proper (comfortable, decorative etc.) sitting arrangement
- Give short breaks while study
- Teaching by using interesting methods
- Use acronym / visual ways for learning
- Embrace New Technologies
I hope that above mentioned suggestions would help to handle with your stubborn and Rebellious children. Toddlers are innocent and they also really don't know pros and cons of their activities. Keep patience and always deal your kids with love and care.
All the Best!
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