क्या आपके बच्चे भी आपस में झगड़ते हैं? [Click here to read in Hindi]
All family members welcomes a newborn at home. Elder child also gets happy to see their sibling. Often, sibling rivalry starts as children grew up; All competing for issues ranging from toys to keeping their attention. It's common for brothers and sisters to fight. As kids reach different stages of development, their needs can significantly affect how they relate to one another.
When you return at home from your office / business then It can be frustrating and upsetting to watch and hear your kids fight with one another. A household that's full of conflict is stressful for all.
This article is a try to explain the most of the common reasons for sibling rivalry and how to handle it.
Rivalry Causes / Reasons Between Sibling Children
Jealousy
In many cases it has been found that most of the brothers and sisters experience jealousy or competition, and it can flare up in disputes and quarrels. But other factors can also affect how often children have to fight and how severe the fight is.
Distribution of attention
Before coming to a newborn one was alone and parents’ full attention was on a single child. Now this attention get distributed and even younger baby required mother's more attention and take care. Sibling child thinks that his/her parents don't give attention on him/her. They think cause for it is newborn and It also cause Jealousy for the sibling.
Love and affection
It is true that younger baby will required attention but sometimes new baby becomes the point of attraction for all. Even parents also love to young one which cause reason for jealousy for the sibling.
Comparison between sibling
Sometimes parents start comparision between siblings which can cause for the sibling rivalry. Parents need to think that all the five fingers never be equal so they need to recognize traits of each sibling child and try to develop it in them. Don't create competitive environment between them; it can cause jealousy between them.
Handling Rivalry Between Sibling Children
Parents should create such an environment so that the situation of rivalry is not created and here are some suggestions given to handle the situation:
Attention, love and affection
It is true that young people will need to pay attention, but try to give proper attention to younger children as well. View videos and photos that were taken with the older child and tell them that when he was a little child he used to take care of him as if he is now a younger brother / sister. It will help the younger child to make understand that the little baby will need to pay more attention. [Read the article "How to Become Perfect Parents???"]
Teach sharing
Always teach sharing thing to your children. This way elder child will share his/her things with young one. It can help in handling/avoiding conflict situations.
Understanding and comparison between your children
As mentioned above that is not to compare between your children as your five fingers are not equal so qualities of all children also can't be same. You should understand the qualities of each of your child and try to develop it. Deliver work according to their abilities and characteristics. Always appreciate your child, support and give guidance.
Friendly behavior
Always share things with your family members and treat your each child as friend. This way they will share their problems with you and you can avoid the future conflicts.
Listen each child
In case, if any rivalry / conflict has been raised then you should listen both sides before your decision action. You should not be bias for young one. On many cases it happens that young one creates situation to start the problems and always elder child get punished for it.
Save books/study material
Sometimes it also cause conflict. We should restrict young child to keep distance from the elder child’s study material. Young one is not able to make difference between toys or study material. So you should be responsible for keeping it safely.
Purchase same type of things for all
Its human behavior that every one likes other's things. If there is not too much age gap then try to purchase same kind of things like cloths, toys etc. for all of your children. Also prefer to buy same color for all. Now a days you can purchase same types of cloths from online even same are available for all age groups.
I hope these small things will be helpful for avoiding sibling rivalry.
All the best!
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